I'm back!!!!!

I have not sent a Bible study for a few weeks, giving you the chance to
apply the principles that we had discussed. How's it been going? Are
you applying the Biblical rules of communication to your relationships? I pray that God is guiding you in this area. If you have fallen back
into your old habits, ask the Lord to help you and begin again!

Now we will move on to the next level. Before we discuss the roles of
husband, wife and parent, we need to evaluate where you are in your
marriage.

I have been fascinated by a book written by Gary Chapman titled "The
Four Seasons of Marriage" (many of you have read his book "The Five Love
Languages"). He states "Marriages are perpetually in a state of
transition, continually moving from one season to another.....Sometimes
we find ourselves in winter - discouraged, detached, and dissatisfied; other times, we experience springtime with its openness, hope and
anticipation. On other occasions, we bask in the warmth of summer -
comfortable, relaxed, enjoying life. And then comes fall with its
uncertainty, negligence and apprehension. The cycle repeats itself many
times throughout the life of a marriage, just as the seasons repeat
themselves in nature."

It has been popular in Western culture recently to exalt emotions as the
guiding light that determines our actions. This is very dangerous and
not Biblical. However, God has made us emotional creatures, and
emotions often tell us that something is wrong or right in a
relationship. Emotions must lead to reason, and reason must be guided
by truth if we are to take constructive action. In the next several
weeks, we will guide you through this process, using the powerful tool
of God's word, so that you may glorify the Lord and exalt his name
together.(Psalm 34:3)

Expect Satan to attack your relationship as you seek to grow. But
remember, if you are a Christian "Greater is He that is in you than he
that is in the world" (I John 4:4) and "In all labor there is profit"
(Proverbs 14:23)

This weeks assignment is a profile. Knowing the season of your marriage
will allow you to take the positive steps to maintain the joys of spring
and summer and correct the sinful behaviors that lead to fall and
winter. All of the steps will be from the perfect marriage manual, the
Bible. It is my prayer that your marriage will be one that brings glory
to God.

If you would like, print the profile, so that both you and your spouse
can complete it.

Four words or phrases appear in each of the following sixteen rows. Choose on word or phrase per row that best represents your thoughts and
feelings about your marriage during the past few weeks. Once you have
checked one word or phrase per row, tally each of the four columns by
counting each check mark in that column as one point. You will have a
score ranging from 0 to 16 for each of the four columns.

1. 0 Discouraging 0 Exciting 0 Satisfying 0 Uncertain

2. 0 Hopeless 0 Happy 0 Peaceful 0 Confusing

3. 0 Empty 0 Hopeful 0 Committed 0 Stressful

4. 0 Harsh 0 Nurturing 0 Secure 0 Frustrating

5. 0 Resentful 0 Open 0 Trusting 0 Tired

6. 0 Destructive 0 Fresh 0 Relaxed 0 Distant

7. 0 Rejection 0 Anticipation 0 Appreciation 0 Apprehension

8. 0 Tension 0 Sharing 0 Honest 0 Drifting

9. 0 Give up 0 Making plans 0 Teamwork 0 Apathetic

10. 0 Critical 0 Caring 0 Connected 0 Concerned

11. 0 Angry 0 Joyful 0 Understanding 0 Burned out

12. 0 Disappointed 0 Optimistic 0 Comfortable 0 Neglectful
13. 0 Untrusting 0 Tender 0 Supportive 0 Afraid

14. 0 Withdrawn 0 Growing 0 Attached 0 Detached

15. 0 Cold 0 Alive 0 Content 0 Prideful

16. 0 Unforgiving 0 Willing to change0 Overlook flaws 0 Growing apart

Column 1 total Column 2 total Column 3 total Column 4 total



You probably figured out that column 1 lists words and phrases that are typically used to describe the winter season of marriage, 2 represents spring, 3 represents summer, and 4 represents fall. The column with the most points reflects the current season of your marriage. You may find your self with a close score, indicating your marriage has elements of both seasons, or may be in transition.

Do you agree with your scores? Are you surprised? If you are willing to be open with me, let me know your score. That would help me with the direction to go in future studies.

Regardless of the season of your marriage, there's hope and there's room for improvement.


Pastor Tim (PT) & Susan Heinrich
Crossroads Baptist Church
pastor@tracychurch.org
814-1815 (cell)
833-8423 (church)